Ricochet

Hi Ashley Agustin, I totally don't remember taking this picture!

So there's been a lot of parties going on lately, so much that it might even be considered unhealthy! There was two in SoCal when I went two weeks ago, Kat's last Saturday (Happy Birthday again!), Tien's on Thursday, poker night yesterday, and then Cathy and Judez today (Happy Birthday girls!). "Where are all of these friends coming from?!" Haha, mom! Well, it's summertime, so I'm going to be having as much fun as I can before school finally rolls around. Can you believe it's Senior year already?

I went to the dentist yesterday with my dad and I was told that all four of my wisdom teeth needed to be removed, and that I should do it before school starts. Just looking at the brochure and seeing how the procedure is done makes me queasy, but I don't really have a choice in this case. Dad said if I wanted to wait, I could do it on Christmas break. He's also in "nicemode" all of a sudden; he's getting me a new phone and also asked me if I want a new computer. I feel bad not working and paying for these things myself, but two months of job hunting has led me absolutely nowhere.

Something has been off lately; nothing seems to be going well and it seems as if a mistake was made, yet I can't put my finger on what it is. It's that same feeling you get when you take a math test and you know you messed up big somewhere along the way, but you can't seem to find your errors and spend the entire period looking over everything, until the bell rings and you're forced to turn it in the way it is. Oftentimes it's filled with a lot of nonsensical bullshit to make it seem like you did some work when in actuality, you did damn near nothing. I hate it, because I know it's not real.

So there's my little update for the week. I'm going to go enjoy my Saturday, and I hope everyone else enjoys theirs as well!

Water water everywhere

First I'm gonna take a dive into that water deep until I know I pleased that body, bodyyyy

Holy blowfish, it's late! I'm eating cup noodles.

Birthday Sex was playing all over the radio today, so I decided to bump it everywhere I went. It's so funny when my mom sings along, because she only sings the "I-I-I" parts, haha. I love my mom though, forreals! She gives me a ride to practically everywhere, even if she has work, and she doesn't mind when I turn the volume up really loud when we we drive around.

I had an orthodontist appointment today. Dr. Nettleman asked me how many hours I wear my retainer a day. "Maybe like 15, 16 hours a day...? Not as much as I should!" Actually, I only wear them when I go to sleep, but he told me my teeth looked fine and as long as my retainers still fit and don't hurt too much when I wear them, then I'm good to go. Another check-up in six months!

So I haven't been doing as well as I could have been with my retainer wear, but I've established a consistent workout routine which consists of 30 minutes on the eliptical (3.5-4 miles), 500 situps via Ab Rocket (10 sets of 50), 300 pushups (10 sets of 30), and varied amounts of curls and butterflies, every day except weekends, because weekends are eating days. So far so good, and tally marks are neat.

Well, I'm getting a new phone soon, and I'm going shopping soon, and hopefully I'm getting my license soon, and hopefully hopefully hopefully REALLY WANT TO get my studio set up soon so I can start recording some stuff. Annddd I'm almost done with my cup noodles, so I'm going to eat hot cheetos as I sip on Arizona and watch Iron Man Armored Adventures (no Avatar tonight!). OW, I just hit my knee on the counter as I was repositioning myself, I'm on the laptop by the way. Nice to have you back. Goodnight!



Oh, and I really, really like swimming.

Questions

I wonder why.

I wonder why sometimes the sun doesn't shine; why sometimes two and two don't go together and visions of my past are around every corner. I wonder why circles never end and why we're all off center. Passing thoughts becoming lingering problems, and I begin to wonder when it is that problems become solutions, if ever at all. I wonder, if the sun should decide not to rise on any given day, would I still be alive, still be breathing? And I think of memories past, of school days and childlike innocence. I reflect upon these waters, as murky as they may be, and remember that it is still water, that my reflection is still on its surface.

Yet I still can't help but wonder how I'm able to wake up with a smile and go to bed with an even bigger one, every single day.

Goodnight!