It's In The Mornin'

I hate how I have nobody to talk to comfortably about this, so I’m just gonna put this out here real quick. Sorry, followers, if this is TMI Turkey-status for you, but hey, isn’t this what blogs are for?

Sex. I don’t know what it means to the rest of you, but for as long as I can remember, I’ve always considered sex to be somewhat of a sacred act, a beautiful art form born out of pure desire and passion on so many different levels, more than the human mind or heart can even begin to comprehend. We all have different reasons for engaging in it - whether it be instant gratification, true love, a means of closure, or perhaps just ennui - but whatever the reason may be, it’s undeniable that on a grander scale, sexual intercourse has simply lost its meaning.

Who am I to be talking about sex like I’m oh-so-wise? Truth is, I’m nobody. Just another regular guy, nothing extraordinary about me. I don’t know much, and there’s so much that I’m still unsure about, but I am sure about one thing: in those brief, blissful moments that were few and far between, I deeply, wholly, and truly did devote every last ounce of passion and love in my body to you, from the very first kiss to the very last sweatdrop.

And it wasn’t until the other night that I finally realized something: I miss it so much. Having someone to pursue, to dedicate myself to, to give all that I have to, through all the pain and the tears, through thick and thin and to the ends of the universe; that’s what makes life worth living.

It’s in the morning, I wanna touch,
It’s in the morning, I wanna love you,
It’s in the morning, no interruptions,
It’s in the morning, sex in the mornin'

Can't Help Falling In Love

It's TUrban time!

Yes, you heard me, TUrban time! That's Team Urban, FYI! For those of you who have no idea who Tim Urban is, this brilliant and incredibly talented young man made his way to the Top 7 on this season of American Idol before being eliminated. I truly believe that he should have made it much farther than that, and I think anyone with eyes and ears would say the same. Not only is he teeming with raw talent and passion, he also sports the Zac Efron look pretty well!

This was the lovely song that I had both the pleasure and the privilege to perform tonight, and what better way to prepare for the big show than to watch Tim's beautiful rendition of the song, over and over again? Unfortunately, I didn't record any of the performances tonight, so until some kind soul uploads their recordings onto Youtube, please enjoy this wonderfully-done cover by Mr. Top 7; I hope you love it just as much as I do.

Concert in the Gym

Man, what's up with this weather!

Tonight was Silver Creek High School's annual "Concert on the Lawn", but due to this wacky May weather we're having, it eventually became "Concert in the Gym". Anyway, back to that in a bit. I think I'll do a quick recap of my day, something that I haven't done in quite awhile.

I've been waking up rather early this week, and although there were some days this week that I didn't shower in the morning, I must admit that it's nice to actually have the option of doing so. It's true what they say, you know: The early bird gets the worm. I guess my 4-hour-long afternoon naps are doing some good, after all!

The school year is finally winding down, and its come to the point where my grades are in the back of my mind now. All that's left to do is a couple of finals and a few presentations (one of which came today), and I'm home free. My Psychology presentation took longer than I expected due to my rambling and I ended up being cut short by the bell, but all in all, I think I did a bang-up job. Next up is my report on Alan Menken for my piano class on Tuesday. I'll be presenting a Powerpoint slideshow as well as performing Part of Your World for the class on that day, which just happens to be my birthday. Thanks, SCHS, for having Senior finals on my birthday. I appreciate it, I really don't. Luckily, my school day tomorrow consists of a play in one period and parties in the next two, which, in addition to the 3-day weekend, will give me some much-needed R&R before my final week of high school starts.

Taking a step back to the concert now. My piano teacher, Ms. Dixon, asked me if I could accompany the choir for a special all-Senior performance as a final farewell to my beloved Class of 2010, and, there's no way I would turn down another performance opportunity! The past few weeks of practices and rehearsals have definitely taken a toll on me, both physically and mentally. Not only did I walk back and forth from school three times yesterday just to be at practice, I've also given up some valuable napping time in the process. On the bright side of things, it's also given me a chance to spend time with a lot of fine folks that I don't normally talk to, such as Martin and Leslie, and of course, chilling with Quiatchon and Fatts (Nicole!) is always fun. Despite all the times I showed up to rehearsals half-asleep, I must say that the end result sure was worth it. Despite a few slip-ups, I honestly think that that was one of the funnest performances I've ever been in. I love you, Class of 2010!

Before I call it a night, I have a quick confession to make: It is only dawning on me now that I am going to be 18 in less than a week, and out of high school in a little less than two. As excited as I may seem to be getting out of here, I have to admit that tonight was the first time I've genuinely felt sadness in my heart as I took one last longing look around at all the beautiful faces on this campus and realized that - as proud as I am of what I've done here - I just gave my final performance at Silver Creek High School as a student.

But my spirits are high and my will unbreakable, and hopefully, definitely, one day I'll return, just to light up the stage one more time for the world to see. Until then...I'll be around.

Note to self: Blog about those delicious steaks I had this past weekend.

Summer Loves.

I love me some Starbucks, and I could love some of you, too.

I would write something heartfelt or witty here, but for the time being I see no need to. In due time, in due time. Let's give it a few weeks, and see where I am then. With any luck, it'll be just a bit farther than I am right now, and not too far off-course. After all, a man's gotta learn the ropes again after flying solo for so long. Don't you agree?

Peace out, cool cats.

Ordinary.

My palm aches. My left palm. There's something off about this weekend. I picked up a penny yesterday - heads up of course - bending low and reaching underneath my car just to get it off the ground. It was blackened and weathered...and one of the most beautiful coins I had seen in a long time. Picking up pennies used to be a routine thing for me, somewhat of a fetish, but lately I've just been walking right past them without a second thought of doubling back to pick it up. As the day went one, my eyelids grew heavier, and before I knew it, thoughts of sleep were all that occupied my mind. Several hours later, here I am, palms still aching and eyes still burning. There's something odd in the air, something interesting. My palm almost never aches, and come to think of it, I can't even recall the last time it's happened, but as naive and irrational as this sounds, I'd like to think that this is all a sign, telling me that something big is coming soon, real soon. Left for love, right for spite, right?


This time we'll take it slow.

Drowsy.

The hardest part of trying to forget about you is the fact that I'm reminded of you everywhere I turn. And the worst part of it all? I can't even control this. It comes when I least expect it and in ways that are unavoidable, blindsiding me into submission every time it crosses my path. Unfortunately, what has been seen cannot be unseen, so to whoever submitted that question to my Formspring earlier, thanks for somewhat-ruining my mood, but out of respect for you, whoever you are, I'll answer your question in the morning.

Goodnight.

famILY.

Have I ever mentioned how much I love my siblings?

Most people don't even know that I have siblings, but yes, I do! Unfortunately for me, I only get to see them once every couple of months, as they both reside in sunny Southern California while I'm stuck here in crappy San Jose for at least two more years. Right now is the perfect time for me to read something like this, and I'm very glad these two small comments came my way just now, because it only reaffirms the bonds that tie us together and shows me that they really are there for me, even if they're not here in person.

Today was a rough day for me. I know I said it yesterday, but I honestly can't stand y'all. Somehow, I managed to survive break, but lunch was way too much for me to take and I ended up leaving the table and walking around school by myself for about 10 minutes before I went to choir practice. Afterward, I walked around by myself, again, for another 5 minutes or so before the bell rang. And after school, I walked home. By myself.

I gotta admit, I'm pretty envious. Envious of all the people who have close friends in their lives, who have someone to spend their free time with and just bug out and be themselves. It's not that I don't have good friends, because I do, and they should know who they are. I appreciate you guys being there, but at the same time, I realize and respect that you guys all have your own group of people to hang out with: your best friends, your girls, your boyfriend or girlfriend, etc., and honestly, the only reason I rarely ask anyone to hang out during school hours is because I don't want to impose. I don't want to be the third wheel, just that guy who's there in the background. If I could, I'd be kicking it with you guys all the time, but I don't leave the table because I have nowhere else to go. And by that, I'm saddened. The people that I spend my break and lunch with are not the people I want to spend time with, and the people I want to spend time with have their own friends and priorities to attend to. What's a guy to do?

All I can do is pray for the strength to survive two more weeks of this. If I can make it that far, we'll see what happens next.

On a positive note, at least I have the banquet tonight to help take my mind off things. And tomorrow is Friday! Oh, and I came home today to find two GIANT tubs of ice cream in my freezer: one mocha and one green tea. To whoever was kind enough to give all this ice cream to my mom: Thank you!

Happy Belated, la troisième partie.

YO DAWG.

See my hoody? Tied strings, courtesy of @conniechiwa! I usually don't have 'em tied up like that, but I gotta admit it looks pretty neat. Thanks!

Facepalmin' cause I had to present by myself today! Well, Mrs. Ayala filled in for your part, so it was all coolbeans. I know you're probably not gonna see this since you're never on Tumblr anyway, but just wanted to wish you a happy 18th birthday! Damn, legal now or whaaaat. Now you can call in sick for me! Hahah, kiddinggg. Anyway, hope you had a blast today staying home and eating ice cream and cupcakes by yourself, and with whatever other adventures you went on. Next time we go out for some Wingstop, I'm paying!

K, back to Government homework. Not crackin'. LAAAATE! Hah, kidding. I finished that a few hours ago, shortly after I wrote this post. Don't take it the wrong way, bloggy, I still love you much more than I'll ever love my Tumblr, and the only reason I posted it there first was so homegirl could see it, but since it was such a boss sauce post, I decided to migrate it over here, as well. Hope you like the title. I'm always late on everything! Haha, goodnight.

May 28th.

I’ve never really understood the point of school dances. Well, sort of. It seems like girls these days will just say yes to anybody who asks them, given that they’re not a creeper or super weird or whatnot. And same goes for the guys, too. See, the thing is, for me…why ask somebody if you’re not at least somewhat interested in them? The whole “going as friends” thing is cool…I guess. But I don’t think you should go with just anybody, and if you plan on skipping out on your date and dancing with random people and friends for the entire time, why even say yes to them at all? I mean, I’m not saying two people have to share feelings for each other or be super lovey-dovey if they go to a dance together, but I’d like to think of dances as ways to spend some time with someone that you have genuine interest in and would love to get to know better, not just something you go to with just whoever so that you could have a good time while you leave your date by themselves. Maybe it’s just me. Maybe I’m just naive. Maybe y’all are right, but we’ll see if I end up going.

-Out.

Find Your Love

I better find your love and I better find your heart.

Spiffy.

WDYWT.

Hey, I told you I'd be back with something spiffy, right? Here's my afternoon wardrobe for today: a Fox pinstripe button-up, Heritage 1981 black-coated jeans, and a beautiful pair of HUF Snakeskin Chukkas, all brought together by yours truly. Feel free to click on the image for a large, higher-resolution version...as if my cheeks weren't chubby enough already.

If you're wondering what the deal is with the outfit, I went to a walk-in interview at Red Robin today. It took a little while to fill out the forms and get everything in order, but things seemed to go pretty smoothly. The gentleman who interviewed me is also named Mikey (who would've thunk it!) and seems to be a pretty laid-back individual. After about ten minutes or so of a few simple questions, he told me that they'd call me back for a second interview if a spot opens up within the next month, and I was on my way again. Fingers crossed, wish me luck!

Anyway, I'd love to stay and chat, but I really ought to be finishing up my exercises and getting to bed. I hope everyone had as pleasant of a Wednesday as I had today. Goodnight!


P.S. Eric Stanley followed me on Twitter today. Totally made my day! For those of you who don't know, Eric Stanley is an incredibly talented violinist and musician. Please check out his Youtube channel, you definitely won't be disappointed!

way high up.

Am I so high up there that nobody can bring me down anymore? I ask myself this question every day, but to no avail.

I wonder who even reads this anymore. I know Kelli does from time to time. Hi Kellz. But lessbehonest, this place is nothing like it used to be. If these walls could speak, they'd say that they've seen better days. I don't know what I'm doing anymore.

Thank goodness for Wednesdays. Something about this particular day of the week seems to ease my stress a bit. I've got some big plans for today; I'll be back with something spiffy later.



Night.

Chortling.

That's all I hear from my parents' room right now!

And if you're wondering why, it's because I wrote my mama a letter in Spanish for mudduh's day, and now they're trying to decipher what it says. Haha! Oh, mom, have fun trying to find a coworker to translate it for you at work tomorrow.

You know, it really irks me when I have to recycle old pictures, but everybody was much too absorbed in good vibes and even better company last night to remember to take out a camera and capture the laughter in a more permanent way, so here's a picture of our celebration of Mother's Day from last year. It's true what they say: some things never change. As a matter of fact, I wore that exact same v-neck both last year and this year, and that's even the exact same cake we had both years as well!

Anyway, it's been awhile since I've done a recap of what goes on in this life of mine. Writer's block is a minor part of it, but what's really been holding me back from blogging lately is the fact that I'm just way too busy to keep up with things anymore. I even have to create a second Flickr account now because I've already used up my 100MB a month limit! Give me a week or so and things will settle down, hah.

I've got quite a lot on my plate this week; although my piano recital went swimmingly last Thursday, I've already got yet another performance to prepare for, as well as a few business matters to take care of. It's getting somewhat-late, and it's Sunday night, so you know what that means: time to wrap up this blog and sit on my bed, browsing around aimlessly on my laptop until the necessity to sleep finally arrives and my eyes close shut. And with that said: Happy Mother's Day!

"The only good is knowledge and the only evil ignorance."

Pretty deep for a fortune cookie. I love this and everything about it. 818/213/714 until I drop dead. Happy May.