And here I am, months passed and an entire school-year older, still feeling these "fuzzy-wuzzies". An oldie but a goodie. In fact, I don't think I've posted this yet, in spite of the fact that it's been about eight months since I snapped this shot on my first trip to Yogurtland while I was in Long Beach, visiting my family on Winter Break. I could sure go for a cup of this right about now! Flipping through the pages of my Flickr today really made me wonder what happened to my love of photography over these past months. At most, it was a simple hobby to me, something to keep me occupied, conveniently aided by the fact that my dad already had a camera that I could use when he wasn't, but the spark is gone now, as it is in a lot of things. I think it's time to get it back.
Today must have been a day to reminisce, as my Flickr wasn't the only thing I reflected upon. So much has occurred, events that have thrown my entire life off-course, and it's somewhat dreadful to think that there are still over two entire months remaining in this year! Yet when I look back upon all that I've done (and haven't done) this year, I can truly say that time flies, whether or not you're having fun. My old blogs, some of which I had forgotten that I had even written in the first place, seem so out-of-place, so disjointed when compared to my more recent musings. Nonetheless, these forgotten blogs still serve as the basis and foundation of everything that I am today. I didn't italicize sentences here and there for nothing, you know!
The last subject that I'll touch upon tonight is one that I don't discuss often, at least not openly, but something that I still feel very strongly about. As some of you may know, I was once an avid World of Warcraft player. My first foray into this little gem of an MMO took place in early 2006, when the "World" was a much different place and the concept of an MMORPG was still generally regarded as "uncool" to the public eye. But to me, it was something to help cope with my lack of social graces, something to dedicate my time and devotion into. Over time I watched the game grow, expand, evolve, as did I. As asinine as this may sound, one of my biggest regrets in life is a decision that I made regarding this very game.
I was never the cream of the crop when it came to my standing in the game, but I was pretty high up there. I had raiding experience in almost every end-game raid in both vanilla WoW and BC, from ZG to MC to Karazhan to SWP, and the pinnacle of my gear progression was a mix of T5 and T6 gear. For most of my WoW-career, I had been in mid- to high-end raiding guilds on my server (Edict of Pain, Mustang Gang, Reckless Hate - Horde, Kil'Jaeden US). In the fall of 2007, I was presented with an opportunity to join the #3 Horde guild on the server, Sigil, an offer which I had turned down due to my desire to spend more time out and about rather than in front of a computer screen. Unfortunately for me, my social life only deteriorated after I had turned down the offer, and by the time I had come back to the game, it was too late.
Sigil eventually disbanded, but not before progressing and defeating nearly all of what BC had to offer. Many ex-Sigil members, including Ambient, one of the most revered Warriors on the entire server, moved on to join a guild called Cuties Only, which my close friends Text and Gouryella/Cashnprizes also eventually joined. I've been away from the game for a very, very long period of time, but I never forget a name. I hopped onto MMO-Champion.com earlier this evening to find a video of Cuties Only tackling on Icecrown Citadel on the PTRs. It turns out that Cuties Only is now one of the best guilds in the entire world. And to think, I could be in that guild at this very moment, making world firsts and being adorned worldwide as one of the best Warriors to play the game.
Was my decision the right choice? I'd say so. Time away from the game has given me a lot of time to mature, both mentally and physically, and allowed me to become more outgoing and adventurous. There are still times when I sit and ponder where I would be today had I stuck to my commitments, but no matter how far my fascinations extend, pixels and guildmates will never compare to those who I am blessed to be with every day, in mind and spirit. (Still, I wish I could say that I had a full set of T9 right now.)
After a long day of looking in the rear-view mirror, I honestly have to say that I miss Junior year, at least to some extent, but I also know that nothing can stay broken forever, and that whatever good and positive that was once present can always be fixed, repaired, built up stronger and better than before. Everyone has their doubts and worries, but in the end, my eagerness and optimism outshine all.
Thanks to those who are taking the time to read what I write, even though a lot of times, not everything will make sense, as I use Blogspot as my own personal space to clear my thoughts and feelings. Thanks again to those who keep up with my life, I'll be sure to do my best to repay the favor.
And just because it doesn't feel right to end my blog that way, one more thing:
I feel fantastic, I'm feeling fine.
P.S. I'm also out of tissues. What the hell!
No comments:
Post a Comment